Wondering if you are dealing with a narcissist? Here are 25 characteristic traits of a narcissist to look out for. Most narcissistic people do the same thing.
It is a bit eerie how most of them are NO DIFFERENT from one another, yet they think themselves special.
Their mindset is phenomenally irrational and staying around them for too long can cause serious neurological damages to you.
This is not a hyperbolic statement.
Check out my article “LONG-TERM NARCISSISTIC ABUSE CAN CAUSE BRAIN DAMAGE“.
With this said, let’s jump on in into the 25 characteristic traits you will find in a narcissist.
- 1 Knowing The Narcissist
- 1.1 # 1 – They Are Likeable…INITIALLY
- 1.2 # 2 – Self-Centered
- 1.3 # 3 – Never Remorseful About Their Wrongdoings
- 1.4 # 4 – After The Initiation Phase (The Love-Bombing Stage) They Become Unreliable
- 1.5 # 5 – Blameshifting and Projecting Their Inadequacies On Others
- 1.6 # 6 – Wears Several Masks
- 1.7 # 7 – Easily Swayed To Feeling Anger
- 1.8 # 8 – Pathological Liars
- 1.9 # 9 – Inpatient As Hell
- 1.10 # 10 – Conversational Controller
- 1.11 # 11 – Hangs On Resentment
- 1.12 # 12 – Likes Annoying Others
- 1.13 # 13 – Mercurial As The Weather In Adelaide, Australia (It’s fickled is my meaning)
- 1.14 # 14 – Hardly Ever Shows Appreciation
- 1.15 # 15 – Grandiosity
- 1.16 # 16 – Sabotages Partners
- 1.17 # 17 – Contradicts Themselves
- 1.18 # 18 – Always Has To Be Right
- 1.19 # 19 – Nobody Understands Me
- 1.20 # 20 – Attention Whores “I’ll Do Anything…ANYTHING For Attention”
- 1.21 # 21 – Your Energy Depletes When You Are Around Them
- 1.22 # 22 – Never Listens To What People Are Saying
- 1.23 # 23 – Likes To Stare At People With The Reptilian Gaze
- 1.24 # 24 – Loves Teasing People
- 1.25 # 25 – Has A Lot Of Yes-Men (Flying Monkeys) Around Them
- 2 Disarming The Narcissist: By Knowing Their Traits
- 3 Need Support? + FREE PEER GROUP APP
Knowing The Narcissist
# 1 – They Are Likeable…INITIALLY
When you first meet a narcissist they seem like they are EVERYTHING you ever wanted in a partner. And the reason for this is because narcissist knows how to put on a mask and PRETEND to be someone they aren’t.
During the initial stage, they do something called “love-bombing”.
What this basically is is them showering us with a great deal of admiration, presents, and…heh… “love”.
The love-bombing is to snare us up in their fishline. They bait us with a character they think we want so they can catch us. And once we are caught their true selves start to slowly develop.
# 2 – Self-Centered
?It’s all about me. ?
?Can you not see??
?I’m the center of the universe ?
?And praise for me should be indefinitely.?
This is the song that goes on in their twisted distorted minds.
“It’s all about me. The world exists because I open my eyes. And when I am sleeping it doesn’t exist.”
# 3 – Never Remorseful About Their Wrongdoings
It is not their problem that you feel pain after they have intentionally tried to hurt you.
# 4 – After The Initiation Phase (The Love-Bombing Stage) They Become Unreliable
You can go to the end of the earth for them for a bag of Doritos, trying to make them happy. And then you can ask them (in hearing distance) for a bottle of water from the kitchen, WHILE THEY ARE IN THE KITCHEN, and they will come back empty-handed.
“Oh…I didn’t hear you.”
# 5 – Blameshifting and Projecting Their Inadequacies On Others
It is never their fault. And if they did make a mistake it was because we made them make that mistake.
# 6 – Wears Several Masks
These people, as I so often say, could give Academy Award actors a lesson in acting. They wear so many masks. They can hop in and out of different characters.
These are the people who can be friendly and confident in the public but will be cruel, cowardice and sadistic in the shadows in the comfort of their homes.
The amount of damage these people do to their spouses and their children is nauseatingly frustrating.
# 7 – Easily Swayed To Feeling Anger
They can enter into a fit of anger on a heartbeat. Anger to them is a defense mechanism. They yell, scream. shout, throw stuff around, and stomp…STOMP like toddlers when they don’t get their way.
And before you think I am teasing them.
No, I am not.
I have seen grown men, years to decades older than me STOMP AROUND when I told them I WOULD NOT DO SOMETHING.
Mind you these guys were older than me. This is why I call them kidults. But maybe I should just call the “Toddlers in Adult Bodies”.
# 8 – Pathological Liars
It can be sunny outside and you can ask them, “how’s the weather today?”
And they will respond, “It looks like it will rain today.”
# 9 – Inpatient As Hell
They have no concept of patience. This is why they are always rushing everyone they are around. Especially true in an office setting.
“We need these papers done by this afternoon.”
“We need this sale by the end of the week.”
“We need to hurry up.”
They do this to try and keep people in a state of feeling anxious and on edge. When you are anxious and on edge than you will be easier to control.
# 10 – Conversational Controller
“Hey, I’m through talking about myself. Let’s hear you talk about me.”
# 11 – Hangs On Resentment
We are told to forgive them for destroying our lives with them. But heaven forbid if you drink the last coke in the refrigerator they were saving for pizza night.
HEAVEN HAVE MERCY ON YOUR SOUL…YOU SELFISH INCONSIDERATE BAD PERSON.
# 12 – Likes Annoying Others
I have often seen this at many toxic workplaces. These kidults will find someone they know they can get under their skins around and mess with them.
Because I (secretly) like them.
I don’t know if any of you remember the episode when Chucky had a crush and she kept doing mean things to him.
Why did she do it?
Because she liked him.
Chucky reciprocated only to find her…teasing another boy by the end of the episode.
Man, Rugrats…this show was supposed to be for kids.
These grown Rugrat kidults will do the same thing. Tease and annoy someone because in their childish mentality that is the only way to get attention from someone.
THEY DON’T GROW UP.
# 13 – Mercurial As The Weather In Adelaide, Australia (It’s fickled is my meaning)
A narcissist will smile one second and then flip into a frown and tantrum the next second.
FOR NO LOGICAL REASON.
I say these people are like toddlers because I use to be a teacher abroad; I taught pre-k to 6th grade.
And I remember teaching my pre-k classroom.
The toddlers (4-years-old) were all smiling when I was singing a song and then the next second the whole classroom erupted into crying and tears.
And I’m sitting there wondering, “What the hell just happened.”
This is exactly how narcissistic people are.
# 14 – Hardly Ever Shows Appreciation
Give them the world and they will say, “you couldn’t give me Andromeda?”
# 15 – Grandiosity
It’s not about FEELING good. It’s about LOOKING good.
# 16 – Sabotages Partners
If you have to study for a test or get ready for something grand they will do everything in them to make sure that you will fail. They love sabotaging your dreams.
# 17 – Contradicts Themselves
This is easily something you will spot with them. Because most narcissistic people are just the embodiment of irrationality it is not uncommon for them to do and say many contradictory things.
# 18 – Always Has To Be Right
Narcissistic people have to always be right and they always have to win. They are like the kid in the Movie “Big Daddy” with Adam Sandler when he was playing a game with him.
Kid: “I win”
Adam Sandler: “Wait how does that work.”
Kid: “Because I win.”
Kid logic and narcissistic people’s logic.
# 19 – Nobody Understands Me
There are some narcissistic people out there who are a bunch of Eeyores.
“Woe is meeee Pooh bear. Nobodyyyy understands meeeee.”
# 20 – Attention Whores “I’ll Do Anything…ANYTHING For Attention”
There are some narcissistic people out there who will do ANYTHING for attention. The people who go around yelling and screaming every time they enter a building.
The people who play music in the cars at the highest volume. And the people who always want to be in the know.
# 21 – Your Energy Depletes When You Are Around Them
Narcissistic people are in every sense of the word “Energy Vampires.” I also like to call them parasites (and again I am not name-calling here).
Read my article ? “NARCISSISTS ARE PARASITES AND WE ARE THE HOST“
# 22 – Never Listens To What People Are Saying
“Um.Hmm. Um.Hmm. Umm. I wasn’t listening.”
Don’t think you can spill your heart out to these people. They just don’t listen.
# 23 – Likes To Stare At People With The Reptilian Gaze
Narcissistic people do this thing called the reptilian gaze. When they see someone they want they watch them as if they are prey. And they also do this when they are secretly envious of a person.
Narcissistic people are not as evolved as they think they are.
# 24 – Loves Teasing People
And they will SAY THIS while being 30+ years old. I have seen it and have many of them do this to me.
These darn precocious Rugrats kidults.
# 25 – Has A Lot Of Yes-Men (Flying Monkeys) Around Them
Be very careful of the people who stay around the narcissist. They have NO MINDS OF THEIR OWN.
The narcissist is a parasite. But the flying monkey is…I don’t really know what to call them.
They have no minds or selves to them. They are readily available to lay down their life for a narcissist. And that is not hyperbole.
I mean, I really don’t know what you can say about a flying monkey because they are just so irrational, beyond the narcissist.
And narcissistic people keep so many of these people around them. So be wary of this.
Read my article “FLYING MONKEYS HAVE NO MINDS OF THEIR OWN“.
Disarming The Narcissist: By Knowing Their Traits
Learning how to spot these characteristic traits of a narcissist at the beginning of the early stages of a relationship will be so important to you as you will be able to end that relationship quick fast.
Narcissistic people DO NOT LOVE PEOPLE. If you have any desire to try and change them for the better…STOP.
DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME with them because they will drag you down in a heartbeat.
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