The Greatest Love Story On Paper
So, one day he was standing at the front of the room cussing me out; telling me how much I sucked, how I hadn’t changed since our last argument (I had been in therapy for 2 months, to which he refused to attend because as he stated “I was the only one who was f***** up because I was in foster care, and he didn’t need therapy”).
As I watched this man, the love of my life whom I had lived with, loved and taken care of for 17 years; who I thought was my best friend and partner in crime tell me what a raggedy human being I was for the umpteenth time I finally relaxed my shoulders and made the hardest adult decision I ever had to make.
NO CONTACT
On April 19, 2016, I decided to leave him and the only life I knew for 17 years. I got a P.O. box, canceled my transfer to our joint account and I moved out 3 days later while he was at work.
For any of you who have left a narcissist, you know the breakup was treacherous. In addition to mourning 17 years of my life, accepting I’ve been living a lie with a stranger and figuring out how to live on my own; I also had to deal with him smearing my name, texting me constantly to either come home or to tell me how much I f*cked up his life and trying to hold it together each day at work as my entire life fell apart. His apologies lacked genuineness and I struggled to understand if I ever knew this person.
It’s been 3 years and I’m still rebuilding. I have good days and bad days but mostly I completely hate that narcissism exists. I mourn all of the good years that I gave him and I feel I have nothing to offer a new person. And I miss what I THOUGHT we had and while I know I’m better off, I really miss my illusion of him and what could have been the “Greatest Love Story” had narcissism not wrecked the ship on my life.
