The Covert Narcissistic Insecure Male: Who They Are & How To Beat Them

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The Covert Narcissistic Insecure Male: Who They Are & How To Beat Them

Males that feel emasculated by MEN they perceive better than them, will take out their frustration on WOMEN whom they feel will never like them, who may never love them, or who may leave them.

These types of guys, and there are LEGIONS of them, are LOSERS. And I say this unapologetically.

The covert narcissistic insecure male is one of the most passive-aggressive people you will come across.

And before you think I am on this “Men are Dogs,” NONSENSE…NO, I AM NOT. 


It’s men who do the most dangerous jobs on this planet. It is men that fight in wars to bring freedom. And it is MEN that protects the weak and oppressed.

Now…women are just as brave as MEN. I am not suggesting bravery is a MAN’S attribute…because it is not.

But there is a type of BEAUTY and a sense of spirit that is unique in MASCULINITY, to which only MEN can ever master.

Toxic masculinity is a trait that can be attributed to the insecure covert narcissistic male.

Because they lack the overall confidence that MEN have they will then seek to try and be superior to these MEN by trying to be smarter than them.

But smart, in this case, does not always mean to be intelligent. It can be cunning and manipulative.

They have no qualms in lying and cheating to get ahead in life because, to them, life has cheated them.

In their inferior way of thinking and perceiving themselves, they think if they were taller, stronger, bigger (use your imagination here), that life would be so much better for them.

They feel like they can never measure up, and as a result, these people will do some of the nastiest things you can think of.

Because they cannot scale to the heights that other men have climbed, they will then, to protect their fragile egos, TEAR DOWN others around them.

“I can’t get to the level you are at, but I can sure as heck can bring you down to my level. Now we will be…EQUAL.”

They are such losers.

They hate women because they know that if they were in a relationship with them that maybe the woman wouldn’t be impressed with them and would leave them.

And worst, they LOATHE a woman who has confidence. Who radiates maturity, confidence, and self-love.

To them, nothing hurts their fragile little egos more than but to see a woman who loves herself.

And to see a man who achieves so much in life, despite the uphill battles they must climb, is CRUSHING TO THEM.

Our success and happiness in life is a slap in the face to them. They are forced to then reflect on themselves, which they do not want to do.

To these LOSERS, this is the ultimate smack in the face to see others are happy and achieving their dreams while they live a nightmare JUST BEING THEM.

In this article, I will explain the antics of these lesser males and explain how you can defeat them.

The Covert Narcissistic Insecure Male: Who They Are & How To Beat Them

Covert Narcissistic Insecure Male

The Covert Narcissistic Insecure Male

Now, to be fair, covert narcissism is not only relegated to males, as females can also be a covert narcissist. And I dare say, I could argue that there are more covert narc females than males.

The movie “Mean Girls indeed, shows the inner world of how covert narcissistic females behave.

What I find HILARIOUS and somewhat off-putting is how the mindset of covert narcissistic insecure males are not at all dissimilar to the mentality you saw in the movie “Mean Girls.”

Most of these covert narcissistic males behave like effeminate males.

And I am NOT suggesting that — to be a gay man or effeminate males is wrong. Because to be honest…I genuinely don’t give a crap about a person’s sexual orientation.

I honestly believe people are BORN this way. You can’t make someone gay.

What I am saying is that insecure covert narcissistic males are NEFARIOUS.

These are the guys who will befriend another guy to find weaknesses to tear him down. These are the guys who will lurk in the shadows trying to cast doubt on others they believe better than them.

They are the guys who cheat on the girls and then beg her to take him back.

These are the guys who have their flying monkeys do there bidding for them and then throw them under the bus if they feel like they will get in trouble.

These guys have no sense of honor or dignity.

They will shift blame to others in a heartbeat. And when they get power, they greatly misuse it, much like the leaders of the CCP (Chinese Communist Party).

Tell me…tell me, these leaders aren’t WEAK.

And this is not a knock at CHINESE PEOPLE. This is a knock at the ruling party there.

The leader XI Jinping banned Whinnie The Pooh because people compared him to it.

That is WEAK to care what others think of you.

Read how they are paying politicians to say good things about them in the U.S because of the virus they LIEDHID, and then tried to CHANGE THE NARRATIVE ABOUT, is causing upset with the people of the West.

Communism is a crappy inhumane political ideology. That’s why it ALWAYS FAILS.

Insecure Effeminate Covert Narcissistic Males fight and play dirty. They have no honor, and they hate people who have courage and dignity.

To them, everything is image and NOT character.

So How Do You Defeat People Like This

Covert Narcissistic Insecure Male

There are many ways to defeat these losers.

For Men

If you are a MAN, know you will be the overall thought in their minds. Like a high school girl who has a crush on her high school teacher, so too will these effeminate narcissistic males think of a MAN they secretly fear.

Know that they will do everything they can to make your dreams never come true.

They love to act as Gatekeepers.

As a MAN, to defeat these losers, YOU MUST WALK YOUR OWN PATH.

What this does is show the covert narcissistic effeminate male that they have NO CONTROL OVER YOUR LIFE.

And this crushes them.

They need to feel powerful over you. And the only way they can do that is by having control over your destination/ your path.

But by walking off that path they are on and creating your own path, you show them how irrelevant they really are.

For Women


Nothing makes women more beautiful than a smile. Makeup only supplements your beauty.

A woman that smiles, despite the harm a covert narc put her through FRUSTRATES them to no end.

Their whole purpose (the covert narc male) is to make you feel as if you are nothing.

And they do this because they feel like they are nothing.

If they can take away your happiness, your joy, your smile, your radiance, your warmth, your light, and make you devoid of feelings, like they are, then they feel like they achieved something.

By simply smiling about the stuff they put you through and moving forward with your life, AS IF THEY NEVER EXISTED, CRUSHES THEM.

And it crushes thems because it shows that despite ALL THE NEGATIVE STUFF THEY PUT YOU THROUGH…it wasn’t enough.

And it wasn’t enough because they are not enough.

By you seeking revenge, what you reveal to these losers is this…


By moving forward and smiling while doing so, you hurt them on a massive level.

They already feel like they are nothing, and by your moving forward with your life, you only reaffirm to them they are nothing.

Listen I Am Not Bashing Men

Covert Narcissistic Insecure Male

I am a MAN. I know many great MEN who do good things for their family, friends, and strangers.

Sadly, society does treat men like we are the problem. Very few cases of men who have to put up with narc wives or girlfriends are rarely ever told.

Few people know how these narc females drive their husband or boyfriend to commit sui*ide.

Few people know how tough it is for guys to express their feelings because they will be viewed as soft or weak.

Which is absurd.

I let my guys cry on my shpulder when thye need to and i think no less of them.

To cry is not a sign of weakness, it is the releasing of your weakness and pain. Click To Tweet

And that takes strength to show your vulnerability.

Very few people know how bias the legal system is against men when it regards custody battles.

It is tough for MEN.

And I dare say that it is because of covert narc effeminate males who get powers of authority.

They were picked on, had the girl they liked taken by another guy, when they NEVER even asked the girl out, or they just have a great level of self-hatred for themselves.

Whatever the reason, these losers occupy many positions of power.

Men, just like women, truly are a rarity.

And this should not be a bad thing.

If you are looking for a relationship, your partner should be rare.

That is what makes them so special.

Narcs are far more prominent in society then we are led to believe.

This shouldn’t be a bad thing, though. It just reveals to you and us that we are unique, special, and a rarity.

This is why we are so hated.

Glass will always envy diamonds because of the diamond's shines, strength, and resilience to overcome pressure. Click To Tweet

While the littlest bit of pressure can crack or destroy glass.

Deal with the unjust hatred of covert narcs and focus on you and your dreams and goals.

Succeed despite their nonsense against you, and you simultaneously make yourself happy and defeat the covert narcissistic effeminate male.

Read More

7 Signs Of Narcissistic Behavior Men ~ Beware These Guys

Struggling With C-PTSD?

I often say that living with a narcissist is like living in a war zone! This comparison may very well seem hyperbolic, but research has shown that living around narcissists can have the same effects on a person’s mind as people living in a war zone!

I wrote an article describing the “10+ Mental Illnesses Caused By Staying With Narcissists“.

These people are monsters, plain and simple.

If you are struggling with emotional flashbacks, dealing with mental and emotional battles that NO ONE but yourself seems to see and feel, and if you find it hard to get out of bed every day, you may be dealing with C-PTSD.

As great as support groups may be, or as profound as articles can be, they are no substitute for professional help. 

Sometimes the best way to heal and move forward is with therapy.

Speaking with someone and getting the hurt off your chest is a great way to unload.

Online Therapy is a site that offers visitors the chance to speak with professional therapists who will be able to help you get through your emotional and psychological battles.

If you sign up with my link, you can get 20% off your first month’s session.

Online Therapy

About Author

I call myself the Rational Humorist. Narcs to me are cancer to humanity. The only way to beat cancer is to fight back against it.

The best way to defeat a narc is to see them as the jokes they are.

(6) Comments

  1. Shurdeah says:

    This helped me alot
    I already moved on and I’m happy but idk why imstill interested in understanding these crazy humans.
    Probably to avoid them

    1. Victoria Hiley says:

      I think it is because it is so hard to imagine that someone can be as stupid and self-defeating as they are. They end up with nothing and it basically all comes down to their own behaviour: cheating, lying, triangulation, gaslighting, the silent treatment, stonewalling and endless manipulation so that they can gain the upper hand over you. Their mantra is not love it is power and control. Sad. There is heaps of information on Quora about narcs. It is interesting to learn about what makes them tick and it’s important to learn how to spot one quickly so you can kick them to the curb and move on with your (more important) life.

  2. Kelly says:

    Your words of wisdom are spot on. I recently divorced one of these men. It took me a lot of research and learning about what makes them tick, that I was able to get a couple steps ahead of him and can now predict his every move, I HAD to get to that point for my kid’s sake. I am their rock and need to help them understand what/who their Father really is. It’s been a rough road for all of us, for sure, but knowledge is power. The divorce took 2 years (together for 23yrs.) and now I deal with anger more than anything else. Anger at the pain my kid’s have had to endure, having wasted so much time, effort, money, The destruction he caused our family is going to take years to recover from. I wish I had the answers on how to deal with the anger…

  3. Stephanie says:

    Narcissists’s live a very miserable existence. It’s truly sad and heartbreaking to watch someone live a life so empty and miserable. I’m not advocating for them, believe me, their behavior is unacceptable. I’m stuck with one and have been with him almost 10 years. Mothers day was last Sunday and for no reason I can see, he took my holiday away from me and i got nothing. It’s a miserable existence in this house and i just want out but for now i cant. I dont show him empathy and it is very difficult to have it at all anymore. All I can say is they dont even know why they lash out, their minds are broken and it all comes from when they were children. I dont know what happened in his life to make him this way, it is the driving force behind who he is. I hate who he is but honestly it makes me sad that he is a product of what someone else created. The narc never learns to self regulate their emotions which cripples their emotional growth leaving them the equivalent of a toddler emotionally. I am grateful that I dont have the weights he carry’s on my shoulder’s. I cant imagine worrying about what everyone thinks of me, strangers and all. I probably wont have the popular post award here but I felt like it was worth leaving my thoughts. Everyone wants to hate and bash the narcs who’ve hurt them, I know how it feels bc I have one of my own. Again I’m not saying their actions or treatment is acceptable by any means, we all know how abusive and devastating they are to our mental health. It is when I sit back and watch him from an outside perspective I can see his existence is nothing but pain and misery. Very sad deal for all involved. Every person in life has a classroom throughout life, it’s how we learn and it’s how we change. I am not saying anyone deserves to be here, I’m just saying we all ended up in this classroom for a reason. It has changed me from being a doormat to people into a strong person. And I do mean strong. I wore my heart on my sleeve and I dont anymore. I can choose to harbor resentment and pity myself for ending up in this experience but then the narc still gets what he wants. I chose to look at it as a learning experience and the things I’ve learned aren’t bad, they were neccessary. I survived the madness and further more I walk with my head high, I am a good person and I will never be defeated by anyone. I cant say the same for the narcissist, they will live in pure hell until they die and probably after, and it’s all because of someone else damaging them as children. I dont want to make anyone mad, so please dont jump all over me, I just hope to maybe turn some perspectives around and help you see that good still comes out of it in one way or another. We are lucky bc we get to move forward, the narc doesn’t. Thank you, and I’m sorry if I offend anyone.

    1. Thank you for your comment.

      And you are a very STRONG and GOOD person, from what I can gather from this post.

      I do agree with you on many things you brought up.

      Especially the “life as a classroom” analogy.

      I to say the same thing.

      Life places us into a classroom and demands for us to take a test to which we are WHOLLY unprepared for.

      Yes, something happened to the narc as children that hurt them, damaged them, broken them.

      It doesn’t make it right what they did, but I can understand.

      Still, I don’t believe we need to be their heroes or punching bags.

      It’s a shame that they cannot regulate their emotions. But I don’t think we need to regulate their emotions either.

      This, to me, is a huge waste of time.

      I have tried doing that with many of them, and the games with them NEVER END.

      I truly thank you for your comment. You made very poignant comments that I wholly agree with.

      Take care and stay safe 🙂

    2. From personal experience, consider this. Think about your reasons for hangIng in there. Do you feel sorry for him? Does the empath in you make you choose his feelings over your own? Are you sacrificing your happiness for his? Are you being a hero for sticking it out? Are you congratulating yourself for being the hero? Have you considered what this is costing your children? Or are you the martyr? You know that martyrs always die in the end, right?

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