Narcissists and “The Caring Manipulation”
“The more cowardice a person is, the NICER they are. Niceness is their tool to control you emotionally and psychologically because they don’t have the strength of character to do it physically.” ~ Xavier Ludwig
It is no secret that narcissists are very manipulative people. To them, everything is a game.
They are kidults, people who never actually grow up psychologically or mentally speaking past the age of 5, or 7, at most!
To these people learning how to use people is a sign of them being smart, powerful, and it makes them feel as if they are superior to everyone else around them.
The way that they manipulate people is via a myriad of strategies.
Be this gaslighting us to make us think we are not sane.
Be that by triangulation, making us doubt ourselves.
Or be that by love-bombing us to give us a specific false version of themselves.
In this article, I want to explain what I call “The Caring Manipulation/ or The Caring Conditioning” is — and how you can stop yourself from being conditioned by these parasitic people.
Note: I was published in a book! Check out “Empathic Warriors Survival Stories : Not Your Ordinary Empath“
Narcissists and “The Caring Manipulation”
“This is for your own good.”
“I am only hard on you because, I want you to be stronger.”
“You’d never REALLY love me. I know that.”
“I know I don’t matter that much to you. But maybe someday you will love me the same way I love you.”
Now, it is okay if you threw up a little bit in your mouth over the last statement.
I do that now when they try and do this tactic what I call as “The Caring Manipulation.”
Now what this is is incidents where the narc tries and tells us something to do but do so in a way that will make us think they care about us or want what’s best for us.
This tactic is supposed to make us never question their actions or demands.
They will use a caring tone and use caring rhetoric to come off as if they care about our well being.
But it is not.
The reason for this is so that we never really learn to “question” their intentions.
As long as we think they have the best intentions for us, we will just blindly follow and listen to what they TELL US!
It is their sneaky way to be authoritative but come off as passive.
Sneaky Cowards Who Use Caring As A Tool To Control
This tactic is more of something you will find in a covert narcissist than the other narcissists.
They will give us gifts but do so right before they need us to do something for them.
When they are scared that we will tell them no for something they want us to do, they will be nervous and timid to get us to do what they want and to feel sorry for not helping them if we can’t.
And when they want to show they still have power over us they will tell us to do something but say “It’s for your own well-being.”
They are sneaky cowards who will wage a war against us for whatever reason that comes to their minds, and do so through caring.
Caring is their “Trojan Horse” to enter into our lives and destroy us from within.
How To Beat These Losers
The way to which you will win against these people is to be FIRM and UNAPOLOGETICALLY YOU.
When they offer you something, tell them, “No, thanks. I don’t take gifts from people, and I don’t like to OWE anyone anything.”
When they ask you to do something and they put on those puppy dog eyes, tell them, “Well, I have no real obligations to anyone but myself. So I will not do that as I owe no one anything.”
And when they try and tell you, “it is for your well-being,” tell them “that it is kind of them to care about your well-being, but you will worry about that.”
You must be firm and unapologetic about what you want with your life.
These losers use the tools of kindness, niceness, and caring to get what they want from others.
Be firm and resolute in saying NO.
If you watch successful people, they do not allow others to provide them anything or give them anything; they do things independently.
Covert narcs are envious people, disgustingly envious.
And they use kindness as a means to use and hurt you.
Be careful whom you let into your life as a friend and take help ONLY from people who matter to you.
Create a system of things you look for in people to enter that friend zone.
I have a list of 7 characteristic traits.
For someone to be an associate, they must have 4.
To be a friend, they must have 5 of the 7 traits.
And to be a lover, they must have 6 of the 7 traits.
Be unapologetic about your traits, and if you hurt someone’s fweewings…oh well!