Self-development will be able to save you from the destruction that is shame, hatred, vengeance, and depression. It is not uncommon for many of us who have been discarded by a narcissist to feel as we are nothing.
For those of us who were thrown away by a narcissist only to see them in a relationship a few weeks later can crush our self-esteem and our ego.
We can feel like worthless, that we are nothing, and the pain of seeing them with others can make many of us enter into many self-destructive bad habits.
Overeating, drinking (drinking only makes the narcissist happy), engaging in intercourse with strangers to numb the pain fo not being good enough, or just ruminating for hours on ends how they left us.
Letting your life fall apart is what the narcissist came into your life to do.
In this article, I am coming with the mission to help you put yourself back together.
Learning how to improve yourself, NOT to get back at the narcissist but to live your ONE life the best way that you can will be the panacea to improve your life.
Let Self-Development Be The Glue That Holds You Together
When we enter into a state of feeling depressed and no longer see the joys of life…the narcissist wins.
When we become overweight…the narcissist wins.
Becoming alcoholics because we can no longer enjoy life…it makes the narcissist happy.
Becoming a shell of our former self gives the narcissist great pleasure.
And becoming LESS THAN what we were before we met the narcissist gives them a high.
Narcissist’s primary objective in life is to destroy.
They have no other objective in life.
Because so many of them are broken, they want to break others.
The saying “hurt people hurt” is very true with them.
When we focus on all the wrongs they did instead of counting on all the good we can do for ourselves…THEY WIN.
Do Not Become A Broken Empath
What I have been observing with so many people who have just left a narcissist is that they feel worthless. But aside feeling worthless, many people also become very fragile.
Meaning they lash out at everyone and everything.
They see a helping hand as a hand that is trying to hurt them.
They hear a compliment, and they hear someone ridiculing them.
And they experience every new encounter with others as a threat.
All of this is what narcissists want.
They want you to become a Broken Empath.
They want people to become so broken that even when people are trying to help them and uplift them, no one can.
And no one can because people who have been discarded have become so broken that anything can destroy them.
Pick Yourself Up…Dust Yourself off…Become Better
Now, I know this is easier said than done. Especially when there are some of us who are suffering from:
- PTSD (this is a thing with people who have lived with narcissists)
- Financial abuse (they try and keep us poor and dependant on them)
- Smear Campaigns (destroying reputations is what they are all about)
- Social Media Stalking (More the reason why you must Ghost them if you can)
There are many reasons and many justifiable reasons. But there are also many ready available SOLUTIONS to moving on.
Self-development has been said to not only help in alleviating depression, but it helps to improve your overall quality of life.
Understand that it is our choice to keep on ruminating over the wrongs that others have done to us, instead of just moving on in life.
Narcissists do people wrong because they have been wronged, and they don’t know how to move on.
They have been so hurt by others that the only way they feel like they can heal is by hurrying others.
What sense does this make?
Thus is the mindset of narcissists. #narclogic
Doing these things will not only make you look better but help you become better:
- Learning new skills (sign up here to learn new skills for FREE)
- Getting back in shape
- Meeting new people
- Creating stronger bonds and connections with people close to you
- Writing WHO you want to be (this helps you get over who you were with the narcissist)
- Become Your Own Boss
- Moving to a different city (starting over again)
These can all help you massively.
By sinking in into the depression, we only give the narcissist what they want.
Broke people want others to break.
Hurt people hurt others.
Be strong enough to improve who you are.
Let self-development be such a massive part of your life that you no longer have time or energy even to acknowledge their existence.
Learn to love who you are at a massive level. So much so that you don’t even have any hatred for them because you have so much love for yourself.
Let self-development be the glue that holds you and puts you back together.