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How To Drive A Narcissist Mad: How To Deal With A Narcissist

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How To Deal With A Narcissist

How To Drive A Narcissist Mad? How To Deal With A Narcissist?

If you are tired of the verbal abuse — say and do this to them to tee them off.

Narcissists know how to berate, belittle, and argue their pants off. They know how to put someone down and make that person feel like they are less than they really are.

Narcs are masters of verbal abuse. It is a craft that they have mastered.

They can be the ones who do wrong and be able, through the power of complaining and blameshifting, get us to think we are the ones who did wrong.

Understand Narcs argue NOT to justify their actions — but to get us to take responsibility for their wrongdoing.

It can feel very tempting to lash out verbally at a narc and get into a battle of denigration with them.

I mean defending ourselves is a natural response.

No one wants to sit there and be berated.

But in a battle with a narcissist, taking the high ground is the best defense — as you get a better perspective of their whole battle strategy.

When you are in proximity with a narc sometimes the only way to win is to attack them in a way they will not even consider.

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This Is What You Say To Upset a Narcissists: How To Deal With A Narcissist

How To Deal With A Narcissist
Photo by Mitchell Hollander on Unsplash

If you want to hurt the narc, and really dig into their ego, then the best thing to say to them is…


Okay. Okay. Hold on.

WAIT before you click off.

Let me explain.

Narcs are psychological warriors.

You have to understand your enemy in order to fight properly.

When a narc lashes out at us verbally it is to make us feel like we are inferior.

If we stay and explain ourselves (by arguing back or by trying to talk calmly) we are showing them that they have power over us.


Because we are explaining ourselves to them. We show them subconsciously that they are some type of authority figure.

When we go full out arguing, and name-calling, that is when they win.


Because that is when they break us. Narcs are hellbent on destroying our character. They do this because they have no characters themselves.

So when we argue and act like them that verifies to the narc that they can BREAK ANYONE.

Taking The Higher Ground

How To Deal With A Narcissist
Photo by Banter Snaps on Unsplash

Walking away is a strength. In a previous article on mines (link here) I talked about walking away from a narc.

I know for many, the idea of walking away after someone has hurt us seems like we are running away or letting them walk all over us.

But the truth of the matter is that when we walk away from a narc we are the stronger and better person.

We show them that we will NOT allow them to sully our character.

We show them that we will NOT be talked to like that.

And we show them that we will NOT tolerate their childishness.

In walking away — and by not saying anything to a narc when they go on their childish verbal war — we remain 100% who we are.

We take ourselves out of that battle to which they are trying to wage against us…and we lose absolutely NOTHING.

The narc loves drama…don’t be a character, or spectator, of their drama.

Walk away and say NOTHING.

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No Shame In Therapy + Free Peer Group App

Narcissistic people can do a wonder on someone’s mind and psychology. In fact, I wrote an article called “10+ Mental Illnesses Caused By Staying With A Narcissists“.

The narcissists and their legion of fools can slowly drive you insane. And sometimes the best help you can ever receive is from a stranger. 

When everyone around you is trying to convince you that YOU are the bad person, sometimes an objective view of you from someone you don’t know maybe what saves you from drowning in the sea of insanity the narc and their legion of fools try and drown you in. 

Therapy can help heal in ways that reading blogs, listening to videos, and talking with other WARRIORS (we are not survivors, we are warriors) can ever do. 

Join my Facebook Fan Page “No Shame In Therapy” to get a 20% discount on your first-month session, as well as articles and updates on the benefits of therapy.

Narcs have a legion of fools behind them to hurt you, I think it would be a good thing to build your own army of warriors and allies to help stand by your side. 

Need Peer Support? Download Wearemore app to vent, get support, or just talk with others who are going through what you are going through!

About Author

I call myself the Rational Humorist. Narcs to me are cancer to humanity. The only way to beat cancer is to fight back against it.

The best way to defeat a narc is to see them as the jokes they are.

(7) Comments

  1. Tuna bintbina says:

    It is so true. You take the wind out of their sails, you don’t give him/her the fuel to continue the abuse when you don’t fight back.

    1. Exactly, No CONTACT is the best form of revenge. Let them destroy themselves.

      1. Jess bathurst says:

        Huge problem is when they (meaning nobody) false diagnose a person, refuse to listen to anything. Eventually taking a man that truly does love and care for them and driving Him mad. Sure that I’m the one that slipped through the cracks but I assure you. This is not a fun place to be. I’m not altogether sure you are giving the best of advice. Not once in my research have any one of you said anything along the lines of “please realize that this is not the be all end all , and that a good form of communication is a good start as opposed to just cutting ties completely”. some people need to be told of these things. Let’s remember we live in a society where some need a warning not to use a toaster In The shower. I of course blame only myself for the crumble of my marriage. But to never have any type of communication after 25 years Kinda eats at a person. Better yet is the fact that no matter what I say it can be seen as sone type of narcissistic trait. My only option. Turn and never look back. That’s fucking great.

        1. I been ignoring phone calls texts he knows that’s not me to ignore him but I’m doing I need to be away from him he’s a horrible person from the inside

  2. Callander says:

    Very good advice! Silence is golden. It works

  3. What do though with a mother who’s a gaslighter and abuses my father and she herself has worked in mental health facilities her entire career? How do I leave her, it means I leave him, and I can’t do that to him. Im all he’s got.

    1. What things is she doing to make you think she is gaslighting?

      Does your father see the abuse?

      Does she use you as a scapegoat?

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