How To Break Trauma Bond With Narcissist

How To Break Trauma Bond With Narcissist

How To Break Trauma Bond With Narcissist

Understanding what trauma bond is essential in dealing with it properly and separating it successfully from a narcissist. A trauma bond happens when you become attached to someone who mistreats and abuses you.

The person may fail to come through on their promises and may regularly indulge in destructive behavior that also affects you. Yet, you feel a sense of loyalty, especially if you’re in a relationship with them.

Trauma bonds can be with family (having narcissistic parents), “friend” (note the quotations), or lovers.

Breaking the trauma bond is very difficult, but it is necessary. 

Narcissists are known to gain their victims’ attachment by exposing them to consistent trauma and abuse, making it harder for them to leave.

This push and pull tactic can do wonders on not only your emotional well-being but your mental well-being as well.

How To Break Trauma Bond With Narcissist

Breaking the bond

The first step to breaking trauma bond narcissist connection is by acknowledging the bond even exists. With that realization, you’ll determine the various ways it is affecting you, and it will be easier to face reality and break the pattern of abuse. 

After accepting that you have trauma bonding, you can accept that it’s not your fault and that you are the victim of narcissistic behavior.

Accept you accept this fact that you don’t deserve that kind of treatment — regardless of what everyone else might say — your healing can begin.

Through this you will realize that the best option is to leave the relationship and start over; or in other words, go NO CONTACT!

Your next step towards healing is adjusting to your new reality. Sometimes, it is hard to accept the abuse you experience, but you can do so by documenting all the bad things the perpetrator has put you through. 

You can ask questions like “how long the behavior has been happening” to help you gain clarity. Ask “what you would like your partner to do differently” and “how it is different from your other relationships?”


Trauma bond definitions can differ with every person, but the signs are usually the same. Some of the signs include other people being disturbed by the situation even if you’re not feeling stuck and helpless in the situation, being involved in the same repetitive behavior, and inability to detach from the abuser.

You know they are not treating you right, but you still feel attached to them.

Struggling With C-PTSD?

I often say that living with a narcissist is like living in a war zone! This comparison may very well seem hyperbolic, but research has shown that living around narcissists can have the same effects on a person’s mind as people living in a war zone!

I wrote an article describing the “10+ Mental Illnesses Caused By Staying With Narcissists“.

These people are monsters, plain and simple.

If you are struggling with emotional flashbacks, dealing with mental and emotional battles that NO ONE but yourself seems to see and feel, and if you find it hard to get out of bed every day, you may be dealing with C-PTSD.

As great as support groups may be, or as profound as articles can be, they are no substitute for professional help. 

Sometimes the best way to heal and move forward is with therapy.

Speaking with someone and getting the hurt off your chest is a great way to unload.

Online Therapy is a site that offers visitors the chance to speak with professional therapists who will be able to help you get through your emotional and psychological battles.

If you sign up with my link, you can get 20% off your first month’s session.

Online Therapy

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