Do Narcissists Apologize
Narcissists are known for their grandiose sense of self and their lack of empathy. So, it’s no surprise that they also tend to avoid apologizing. They often blame others for their own mistakes, and will not tolerate feeling shame.
However, there are times when narcissists tend to apologize. They may do this if it suits their needs or if they think it will make them look good or hope it will make you forget ever seeing their true selves.
Narcissists and Apologizing
Narcissists will rarely apologize for their wrongdoings/or fault. They may say they’re sorry, but it’s often insincere. People with narcissism traits generally don’t see why they should have to apologize and view it as a sign of weakness.
If they do apologize, it’s usually because they think it will benefit them in some way or make them look good.
Sorry is just a word, not a gesture.
Narcissists also tend to blame others for their mistakes, so even when they do apologize, it’s often with a lack of responsibility or remorse.
How does a covert narcissist apologize?
When it comes to a covert narcissist apologizing, it’s not always as simple as saying “I’m sorry.”
There are a few different ways a covert narcissist might apologize – or rather, what they might do in place of a traditional apology.
Here are three possible scenarios:
- The covert narcissist might try to rationalize their behavior. Instead of admitting they did something wrong, they might try to justify their actions by explaining the circumstances in a certain way. For example, if they hurt someone’s feelings, they might say that the person deserved it because of something they did or said.
- The covert narcissist might make an empty gesture. This could be anything from buying the person a gift to promising to change their ways.
The Psychology Behind Why The Narcissists Apologized
There’s a common misconception that narcissists never apologize. The truth is, they do- but only when it suits them. A narcissistic apology is usually less about what happened or making amends and more so about manipulating the situation to their benefit.
1. To Save Face (They Desire To Keep That False Image)
Narcissists are all about appearances and they hate to look bad. So, if they’ve done something that’s caused them to lose face, they’ll apologize as a way to try and regain control over the situation.
2. To Get What They Want (They Still Need Certain Things From You)
Narcissists are also known for being manipulative and often use apologies as a way to get what they want from someone. For example, they might apologize for their behavior in hopes that the other person will forgive them and continue to give them attention or validation.
3 – To Hoover You Back To Them (There Are Other Things They Need From You Still)
They want to manipulate you into forgiving them so they can continue abusing you.
When do narcissists apologize?
Narcissists typically apologize when they stand to lose something important. For example, they may apologize if they’re in danger of getting fired from their job or if their spouse is threatening to leave them. In these cases, the narcissist is motivated by self-preservation and not by genuine remorse.
Narcissists may also apologize as a way to manipulate others. They may use an apology as a way to get what they want or to get out of trouble. For example, a narcissist may say they’re sorry to avoid being punished or to get someone to forgive them.
How do narcissists apologize?
Here are just a few ways most narcissists apologize to someone else:
- “I was just kidding.”
- “I am sorry that you feel I am a bad person.”
- “I am sorry if I may have done anything wrong.”
- “I already said I was sorry.”
- “I regret that mistakes were made.”
- “Maybe I should have asked you first.”
- “You know I’d never hurt you.”
- “I guess I owe you an apology.”
- “I will apologize if you agree never to bring it up again.”
- “I’m sorry, but you started it.”
- “I am sorry for all the things I have done that upset you.”
The impact of a narcissist’s apology
When a narcissist offers an apology, it is often insincere and self-serving. They may apologize to avoid taking responsibility for their actions, to shift blame onto someone else, or to manipulate a situation to their advantage.
While a narcissist’s apology may provide momentary relief or satisfaction, it is important to remember that their apologies are not genuine and should not be taken at face value.
The value of a narcissist’s apology
It really depends on how sincere the apology is. Narcissist apologizes mostly because they are trying to hoover the empath back into their life.
These fake apologies usually also shift the blame to the person who has been harmed by the person with a narcissistic personality disorder.
It is rarely ever sincere that these people apologize with good intentions, and thus the value of an apology is meaningless.
What do you say to a narcissist when you get an apology?
“Okay.”
“No problem.”
And my favorite, just walk away.
Avoid repeating and forgiving these people. These false apologies are only given to try and rebuild trust and take advantage of you again.
How do you get a narcissist to say sorry?
You don’t.
It is a waste of time trying to get these people to apologize to you.
Your Low Self Esteem Will Never Heal From Their Apology
Low self esteem puts you in a position where you are always looking for sincere apology from someone who can never give it (or rarely gives it).
Often times most people get empty apologies that add more pain to their trauma.
Narcissists struggle with giving a genuine apology because it makes them feel guilty — and narcissists prefer to always feel like they are right all the time.
They will most likely never admit feeling, or acknowledge, any form of guilt.
Learn to end your relationship because they will harm you for as long as you keep letting them back in your life.
Learn To Expressing empathy With Family and Friends
Not everyone is deserving of your empathy. There are dark souls/spirits out there that love feeding on the hurt of other person’s feelings.
You can forgive, but never forget what they did and never ever wait for their apologies.
